Is Laughter Really the Best Medicine?

They say laughter is the best medicine. I don't think so. I think it's morphine.

I have had many surgeries, and the last thing you want to do is laugh. It doesn't make things better, it hurts! My younger brother, Fred, is a very funny guy. We've always made each other laugh. He called my hospital room and I told him not to make me laugh. Impossible. He couldn't do it. After we hung up, I didn't ask for more laughter, I asked for morphine.

Laughter can certainly lift the soul. "I never lend money to my brother-in-law. It gives him amnesia." That joke, written by Henny Youngman, is very funny. It makes me laugh each time I think of it. It lifts my soul, and I think that is what people are talking about. 

Here are some jokes from other famous comedians that will make you smile. 

"I'm old. Yesterday, I walked past the cemetery and two guys started chasing me with a shovel." 

"I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone."

"I saw a commercial, and they said you could make three easy payments. Forget that. I wantto mmake two easy payments and one really tough one."

In very difficult times, even attempting to write something funny can be a challenge, but I'm hopeful that I made someone smile during what is certainly a stressful or personally difficult time of year. Life is too short to be gloomy, which is really a weird word. 

I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season. If you're struggling, go see some comedy. If it's good, you'll feel better. If not, there's always morphine. 

See you tomorrow.

Check out my books on Amazon.com! Just search for my name. There is still time to treat yourself or others to the gift of laughter! 

@Pontifex

The Pope is now on Twitter. Great, now pedophile priests will have another tool.

What's next? @Charlesmanson? Anyone can get an account, placing children at risk. That's what we need.

I'm not inferring that most priests are pedophiles. In fact, it happens in most any religion. What I am saying, is that parents should oversee their children's accounts, be they Facebook, Twitter, whatever.

I know some parents think it is a violation of their child's privacy. I strongly disagree. I think it's bad parenting, and puts your children at risk.

No one wants to be a "Home Alone" parent, so please drive your children to school or have a trusted relative drive them, if possible. Carpooling is a great idea. We have to stop taking so many chances with our kids.

See you tomorrow.

Runners

The only way I would run 26.2 miles is if clown with a bloody knife was chasing me.

I just started running as a means to relieve stress, lose weight and gain strength. The stress and strength part is working. Peanut M&Ms are keeping the weight from coming off. I'm only training for a 5K,and then we'll see where that takes me. 

Most runners, I think are basically crazy. But they all have reasons for running. Some run to relieve stress, others just had fun doing it, while others are completely addicted to it.

There is an amazing group of people that I know, who run for others who can't run for themselves. These people makeup the Hometown Heroes. This amazing group of people train for events that vary from 5K runs to Marathons, and more.

They train for months at a time, in Utah, beginning in November. They brave the elements; freezing temperatures, snow, ice, etc.; so they can raise money for The Huntsman Cancer Foundation.

These selfless people work very hard for various reasons. Some are cancer survivors, others have lost loved ones to this horrid disease, while others deeply believe in the cause.

The Heroes raise hundreds of thousands of dollars each year to fight cancer, and it's not through pledges based on how many miles they run. Between runs, they seek donations any way they can. They are dedicated!

Led by Elfi Ortenburger and assisted by Rick Ortenburger, her husband, Elfi never asks for or receives a dime for her endless work training new and experienced runners, planning the training routes and distances for each, not to mention running and fundraising too.

The Ortenburgers are great friends, and great people, as well. You can help this great cause by either running or volunteering to help out, if you live in Utah, or by donating through the organization, wherever you are.

Go to their website: http://www.huntsmancancer.org/giving/huntsman-cancer-foundation/events/huntsman-hometown-heroes and see how you can help. 

We've all been touched by cancer, now you can help in the effort to wipe it out! 

Oh, but I'm serious about the clown.

Get my books at Amazon.com 

Dreams of a Boy

When I was a kid, I dreamed of the good life.houses, cars, money, women. Then I got married and blew the whole thing.

Obviously, a joke. The truth is, I've been married 4 times. I know! After the third wife, who started doing meth, the night before the wedding, I decided that was it. No more. Her family told me afterward, that her first marriage ended the same way. Information that might have been helpful eight months earlier!!

I won't mention who she is, or from where she's from. That would be unkind. I'll only say her name is Sandy Beckmann, and she lives in Fredericksburg, Texas.

Now George Clooney has the right idea. He's living the life. Now people are saying he's gay, just because he hasn't married. They spread the same rumors about Rock Hudson... Uh oh...

I wound up with 3 wonderful children, and bad credit. The children and grandkids make it all worthwhile, except for the one from Texas.