Last night, the doorbell rang at 3 am. I ran to the door and discovered a slightly drunk guy asking me for a push. I told him to wait until I got dressed. Then, he was gone. I yelled, “Where are you?” He said, “Over here, on the swing.”
http://jerrymabbott.com/2015/01/05/smart-drunk-guy/
After being stuck in a muddy road, a guy paid a passing farmer five dollars to pull him out with his tractor. He told the farmer that at those prices, he should be pulling people out of the mud night and day. "Can't", said the farmer. "At night I haul water for the hole."
http://jerrymabbott.com/2014/12/12/scam/
