Ventriloquist

NFL coaches have to cover their mouths with their play menu cards to keep the opposition from reading their lips. I think they should all become ventriloquists. Problem solved.

Sometimes we think that a dummy is already sending in the plays, right? How many times have you seen your favorite football team cruise down the field using an arsenal of weapons. On the ground, through the air, sweeps, slant passes, screen passes, draw plays, no huddle offense, only to see them get inside the ten, first and goal! They run three on the ground, right up the gut, and settle for a field goal.

In the meantime, you're screaming at the television, hoping that the coach or offensive coordinator will hear you and mend their obvious mistakes. You have no luck, so you loudly complain to the guys there. At least it makes you feel as if you've been heard. Then the waitress comes to tell you that you need to calm down if you want to stay.

For some reason, football games and matches seem to drum up so much emotion, along with basketball and all at either the collegiate or professional levels. It's sort of like being surgically attached to our favorite teams so we become one with them. That would seem to be the only explanation for us using terms like "we" and "us" in reference to our favorite teams.

It doesn't seem to be as pronounced in baseball, tennis or golf. Baseball fans get excited, but it's a very long season and your favorite team can fall out of contention early on. We lose interest quickly when that happens and, well if we did that with golf or tennis it would just be creepy.

I love baseball and I'll even record a game with teams that I have little interest in. I have a favorite National League team and a favorite American League team. Last year, they played each other for the championship. I won't call it a World Series until they work in any nation that wants to host a team. I digress. This year, the Detroit Tigers are still on fire, while last year's champs are in last place and going nowhere. Go Tigers!

Sports memorabilia sales never seem to slow down. I wear Miami Dolphin t-shirts and hats even when they're not doing well. If anyone teases me about wearing the gear, I just tell them it just reminds me that the Dolphins are still the only NFL team to go undefeated including the Super Bowl. Tough to come back with that one. One guy tried once, by asking how long ago it happened (1972). I merely asked "Um, let's see... How long ago did your team do it"?

For me, this is the best time of the year. The temperature is dropping, sweater season is right around the corner, fall and all things pumpkin are on the horizon and there is soccer, baseball and football all happening now. I love it!

See you tomorrow.

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