2014

Everyone is talking about 2013. I'm going to reflect on 2014. That's right, reflect.

2014 was a great year, in some strange sort of ways.  First, we fell off of some sort of money cliff, but all that really happened was we once again realized that most of our elected officials seem to only have self interests. But, at least our credit rating fell again, which actually caused me to relate to our country more.

Donald Trump challenged President Obama to prove he was not an alien. That all came to an end when Trump, on episode five of Celebrity Apprentice, fired his hair and was institutionalized.

Martha Stewart admitted to being a hoarder and allowed Barbara Walters to interview her. It was horrible. The entire house was filled with glitter and hand crafted faux feces.

The Chicago Cubs won the World Series, and every single Illinois adult was so stunned, not one word was spoken until December, when the Bears finished the season 0-16, blaming it on, and extending Jay Cutler's contract 10 years, making him the highest paid player in NFL history.

NCIS continued to lead in the ratings, while The Simpsons came to an unexpected end when Homer got lost in Marge's hair and hasn't been seen since.

Turmoil continued in the middle east, but not on "The View". The show was postponed temporarily because Sherri cracked a joke about the Amish and was sued by an Amish man named Frederick. The case was thrown out of court when Frederick, under intense cross examination, admitted he saw the clip on YouTube.

Jay Leno's chin defected to Fox and started it's own late night talk show. It is beating Leno in the Nielsons.

There were many more highlights and, sadly, lowlights as well, but that pretty much sums it up. Oh, there is one more tidbit. Americans hit an all time low in following through on ridiculous resolutions.

See you tomorrow.

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