Monday, December 17, 2012

Crazy Things We Say

I greased my elbow yesterday, because my Dad always told me to use it. Now my wife is mad, because I got grease all over the house. Thanks, Dad.

We've heard that term since we were kids. Some say it originated in the Navy, as a practical joke to cadets, who are sent all over the ship looking for elbow grease. I hope that's the case, because that seems like a fun prank. 

As a matter of fact, I know it's a great prank, because I've done something very similar in the past to unsuspecting new hires. I ran a clothing store in a mall in my early twenties. I hired a girl who was trying to fit all of our Levis on the shelves in our showroom, which was impossible. She came and told me the dilemma and I said, "Oh, yeah, go in the back by the layaways and get me the wall stretcher.So, off she wewent, only to return and say she couldn't find anything. 

I apologized and told her I forgot that I had loaned it to a shoe store in the mall. I called the store as she was heading down to have that manager tell her he lent it to another store. Finally, the llast store she went to told her there was no such thing as a wall stretcher. She came back to the store and locked herself in the bathroom, where she finished her shift. She came in the next day smiling. She finally thought it was funny. 

Others say the elbow grease term came from plumbers, who used grease to attach curved piping, known as elbows. Who knows? There are lots of sayings we use but don't understand.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush? Seriously? The only bird I ever have in my hand is a dead turkey. Two in the bush would rot. Gross.

The third time's a charm? I beg to differ. I've been married 4 times. The third one didn't last either. A charm? I hardly think so.

If you love someone, let them go. If it's meant to be, they will come back. If not, it was never meant to be. Really? How about proposing? Well, based on my experience, maybe that's not such a good idea.

I need to call my attorney.

See you tomorrow.

Check out my books at Amazon.com. Just search for my name. Give the gift of laughter this year, and pick one up for yourself! 

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