Bandaid!

I just started a band. I'm calling it 999 Megabytes because we haven’t done a gig yet.

I can only imagine how hard it is to keep a band together and happy. It's tough enough to get 5 people to agree that it's Wednesday, let alone agree that someone's song is better than yours, someone's a better leader, three of the guys think the new guy has no talent; etc.

I think it's the same way in almost anything. Clubs, business, jurors, churches, improvisation groups, you get the picture. When one person is in charge, there is going to be trouble.

There's a typical honeymoon period, when everyone thinks that they are going to be amazing, popular or rich or all of the above. But, I think we all know how things change following the honeymoon.

Once, I had an employee who was about to get married. He was giving everyone advice about marriage. Finally, I told him to shut up because he had no idea how his life was about to change. This guy would always walk into the office with coffee and scones. He was happy. Then, about a month into the marriage, he came in without his scones (literally), mumbling "Why do women have to be that way?" I just smiled.

Reality sets in, at some point, and if success doesn't come fast enough, people have a tendency to quit. I've had a few businesses in my time, and I have found that partnerships rarely work. In my case, I was too demanding to make the partnerships last.

Those of you who have a business, or run one, know that you don't stop working. Ever. You can't. Someone needs to be the leader, typically the one with the vision for the operation. I will admit that I was too pushy to be a really good business partner. I felt the need to be the best. Failure was not an option.

In one case though, I was approached by the entertainment editor of the newspaper to renovate a showroom and make it a comedy club. I had the number one radio show, and since he was the entertainment editor, how could we lose?

As soon as we opened, the editor quit his job. I wanted to throttle him. He decided that since he had a business, he would be making so much money, why not nuke the bridge.

I was incredibly angry because now there was immediate cash flow pressure. We had agreed to pour all of our profit back into the business until it grew enough for him to leave his job. I would keep mine forever, because I had the best chance of bringing in crowds.

Since this knucklehead quit, we were unable to make a profit because we had to support him, too. So, we had no money for advertising, new products, better comedians, etc. My partner became very depressed, and stayed in his basement all day, playing Doom, which bothered me on several levels.

I could picture him snapping and wiping out the whole staff. My wife ran the kitchen, I handled the day to day operations. He played Doom. The club lasted five months. What a shame. I haven't opened a business since.

I taught comedy, worked 10 hours a day at the radio station. Aside from doing my show everyday, I was also the operations manager. I also started an Improv Troupe, so life was insane. But, I had no business partner. Life was good. I made all of the decisions and we were successful. It was great, and I kicked myself for not flying solo in the earlier endeavors. Well, such is life.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm late for a business meeting with myself.

See you tomorrow.

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